Literature:Be prepared

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BE PREPARED SCENE

Banzai: Man, that lousy Mufasa! I won't be able to sit for a week!

Ed: {Laughs}
Banzai: It's not funny, Ed.

Ed: {Tries to stop laughing, but bursts out worse}
Banzai: Hey, shut up!

Ed: {Can NOT stop laughing}
Shenzi: Will you knock it off!

Banzai: Well, he started it!

Shenzi: Look at you guys. No wonder we're dangling at the bottom of the food chain.

Banzai: Man, I hate dangling.

Shenzi: Shyeah? You know, if it weren't for those lions, we'd be runnin' the joint.

Banzai: Yeah. Man, I hate lions.

Shenzi: So pushy.

Banzai: And hairy.

Shenzi: And stinky.

Banzai: And man, are they...

Shenzi and Banzai: Uuuugly! {laughter}

Scar: Oh, surely we lions are not all THAT bad.

Banzai: Ohh. Oh, Scar, it's just you.

Shenzi: We were afraid it was somebody important.

Banzai: Yeah, you know, like Mufasa.

Shenzi: Yeah.

Scar: I see.

Banzai: Now that's power.

Shenzi: Tell me about it. I just hear that name and I shudder.

Banzai: Mufasa.

Shenzi: Ooooh. ... Do it again.

Banzai: Mufasa.

Shenzi: Ooooh!

Banzai: Mufasa. Mufasa! Mufasa!

Shenzi: ...Oooh! It tingles me.

Scar: I'm surrounded by idiots.

Banzai: Not you, Scar; I mean, you're one of us. I mean, you're our pal.

Scar: Charmed.

Shenzi: Ohh, I like that. He's not king, but he's still so proper.

Banzai: Yeah. Hey, hey. Did ya bring us anything to eat, Scar, old buddy, old pal? Huh? Did-ya-did-ya-did-ya?

Scar: I don't think you really deserve this. I practically gift-wrapped those cubs for you. And you couldn't even dispose of them.

Shenzi: Well, ya know. It wasn't exactly like they was alone, Scar.

Banzai: Yeah. What are we supposed to do-- kill Mufasa?

Scar: Precisely.

--CUT LINES--
Scar: I never thought hyenas essential.

They're crude and unspeakably plain.

But maybe they've a glimmer of potential

If allied to my vision and brain.

--END--
Scar: I know that your powers of retention

Are as wet as a warthog's backside

But thick as you are, pay attention

My words are a matter of pride

It's clear from your vacant expressions

The lights are not all on upstairs


Scar: But we're talking kings and successions

Even you can't be caught unawares


Scar: So prepare for a chance of a lifetime

Be prepared for sensational news

A shining new era

Is tiptoeing nearer


Shenzi: And where do we feature?

Scar: Just listen to teacher


Scar: I know it sounds sordid

But you'll be rewarded

When at last I am given my dues

And injustice deliciously squared

Be prepared!


Banzai: Yeah, Be prepared. Yeah-heh... we'll be prepared, heh. ...For what?

Scar: For the death of the king.

Banzai: Why? Is he sick?


Scar: No, fool - we're going to kill him. Simba too.


Shenzi: Great idea! Who needs a king?

Shenzi (and then Banzai): No king! No king! la-la-la-la-laa-laa!

Scar: Idiots! There will be a king!


Banzai: Hey, but you said, uh...

Scar: I will be king! ...Stick with me, and you'll never go hungry again!

Shenzi and Banzai: Yaay! All right! Long live the king!


All Hyenas: Long live the king! Long live the king!


Hyenas: It's great that we'll soon be connected.

With a king who'll be all-time adored.

Scar: Of course, quid pro quo, you're expected

To take certain duties on board


Scar: The future is littered with prizes
Scar:
And though I'm the main addressee
'
The point that I must emphasize is
'
You won't get a sniff without me!
'

Scar: So prepare for the coup of the century
Scar:
(Oooh!)
Be prepared for the murkiest scam
'
(Oooh... La! La! La!)
Meticulous planning
'
(We'll have food!)
'
Tenacity spanning
'
(Lots of food)
'
Decades of denial
'
(We repeat)
'
Is simply why I'll
'
(Endless meat)
'
Be king undisputed
'
(Aaaaaaah...)
Respected, saluted
'
(...aaaaaaah...)
And seen for the wonder I am
'
(...aaaaaaah!)
Yes, my teeth and ambitions are bared
(Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo)
Be prepared!
Livu alaksi!
All (Even Ed): Yes, our teeth and ambitions are bared -
Be prepared!